Female Bonding
by jawsoxz3
Summary: Sara and Catherine do a little female bonding on a slow night


Female Bonding  
  
Coments? Feedback? send to csigal1976@yahoo.com  
  
Catherine Williows and Sara Sidle sat int he breakroom of Las Vegas CSI department, bored out of their minds.   
  
"If I stare at this file for one more minute, I swear, I am going to go blind," Sara excalimed, throwing the file on the table in front of her. She made her way over to the coffeepot only to find it empty. She began to brew anohter pot.  
  
"I know what you mean. I have been sitting here staring at the same file for so long that my ass is numb. You know, how unfair is it that Griss takes the boys with him on the only case tonight?" Adding her file to the pile Sara had started, Catherine then picked up the latest Cosmo.  
  
"Whatcha reading?"  
  
  
  
"Cosmo. And just between you and me, I know whose subscription it is. I used some of the phenylalanase to lift the black marker off the label of last month's issue. I've been holding this over Greg's head for a month now," Catherine answered with a smirk.  
  
"Greg? You're joking! I would have pegged him more as a Maxim reader. Interesting. Maybe that's what has inspired some of his more ~ahem~ edgy hairstyles in the past."  
  
"Maybe. I bet he just subscribes for all of the polls and sex articles. Although, the articles are aimed at women. Why would Greg ever want to read about things like...hmmm...ah, here we go. Page 67. 'What kind of ass does your man have?' "   
  
"God, how funny," Sara replied. "Let me see that." Returning to her seat across from Catherine, Sara took the article and scanned it.  
  
At Sara's intermittent chuckles, Catherine finally asked, "Okay, what gives? Surely the article can't be that funny."  
  
"Oh, it's kind of funny. But, it actually reminded me of something my mother once told me. My mom used to say that you could always tell the size if a guy's...well, you know...his..anyway, she said that you could tell how *large* a guy was by the kind of ass he had."   
  
At Catherine's raised eyebrows, Sara continued. "You see, she said that the mass was only distributed on one side. So, if the guy had no butt whatsoever, then he had a large penis," Sara smiled.  
  
"And conversely, " Catherine supplied, "If the guy has too much junk in his trunk, he's a Tiny Tim? That is so funny! You know...hmmm...I think your mom is right. It certainly applied to Eddie. And a few other choice butts that come to mind. What do you think? Was you mom wise beyond her years?"  
  
"You know, I never gave it much thought, but now that you mention it, it does seem to hold true. My last serious boyfriend...HUGE ass. Total baseball player butt. Small wee wee."  
  
At that moment, Warrick, Nick, and Grissom filed into the breakroom, back from their case. With no acknowledgement to Catherine or Sara, they all walked over to the coffeepot and stood with their backs to the women, awaiting their cups of coffee. Unknowingly, the women were provided with quite a view.  
  
Finally, cup of coffee in hand, Nick turned and addressed them. "Hey ladies. Miss us?"  
  
At that, both women erupted in a fit of laughter. Five minutes later, both women had finally settled down. Not one of the men, however, managed to pry any information out of the women regarding their fir of laughter. Perplexed and annoyed, the three left for the evidence room.  
  
"Oh my God!!! That was so damned funny!" Sara laughed.  
  
"Tell me about it. How ironic. So...what do you think?"  
  
"About what?"  
  
"Oh, come on Sara. You know what I mean."  
  
"OKay, okay. Well, um...poor Nick," she laughed. "He definitely has a baseball player butt."  
  
"No kidding...but, at least the Texas charm helps make up for it. And, hello, did you see Warrick? He definitely has an ass, but it's not that big, not that small."  
  
"Mmm hmm. Just right. Guess that applies to the other side as well."  
  
"Damn, I should have gone after him a long time ago. So..uh...I saw you checking out Grissom's ass."  
  
"I did *not* check out Grissom's ass."  
  
"Girl, please. I saw you. Hell, I even snuck a peak myself."  
  
"Um...Cath...Griss has *no ass*. At all."  
  
"I know. And you know what that means. It's always the quiet ones." Catherine thought for a second and looked up at Sara with a smile. "I think that you need to do a little empirical research. Find out if our theory holds up. You know, Griss could help you. He's always up for science. No pun intended."  
  
"Catherine!" Sara shrieked. "I can't believe you just said that."  
  
At that moment, Grissom walked in for a refill.   
  
"What was that I heard about Grissom and research?"  
  
"Nothing. Nothing, Griss. Catherine is just bored and causing trouble. Ignore her," Sara quickly supplied.  
  
Sara then got up and dragged Catherine out of the room before she had a chance to embarrass her any further.   
  
Sitting where the two women had previously been, Grissom scanned the table and picked up the magazine. It had been opened to an article one men's asses. He breifly scanned the article and turned the page. ON the following page, the article continued. there was even a blurb from the author stating that she believed the butt of a man spoke volumes. It could even give you insight into the size of a man. Grissom read with fascionation as the author told that men with small butts had large penises, and vice versa. Grissom smiled to himself and two thoughts occurred to him. First, no wonder Sara and Catherine were laughing at them. And second, the author *must* have done her research. ;-) 


End file.
